No thanks; I’ll stick to my fingernails.

OK, not all of it looks like this. But even in first class, take away the frills (like real plates and napkins), and it ain’t always that hot.

And of course, you’re lucky if you even get more than a handful of pretzels on a domestic flight.

But being an airline chef — yes, there is such a thing — is a real high-wire act.

Imagine tinkering around in the kitchen to make things just so. And then trying to serve it up to your guests, who already feel trapped. After all, it’s not like it’s a restaurant, where they can just up and leave.

On top of which, they’re eating with a handicap, but don’t realize it …

Listen up.